


Wasting Time

by whiterabbit1613



Series: Twelve Days (2007) [11]
Category: MASH (TV)
Genre: Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-22
Updated: 2012-08-22
Packaged: 2017-11-12 15:43:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 471
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/492891
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/whiterabbit1613/pseuds/whiterabbit1613





	Wasting Time

The 12 Days of Christmas Day 11 : Wasting Time  
m*a*s*h; humor; gen(ish)  
  
     Hawkeye was extremely disappointed to learn that he'd been wasting his time. Though this wasn't an uncommon occurrence (in fact, he prided himself on his ability to do it endlessly, when he wasn't performing meatball surgery), it was the first time in a long time that he'd been squandering his efforts on a nurse of the female persuasion, only to discover that, for some unfathomable reason, she was not interested in anything that Captain Benjamin Franklin Pierce had to offer.   
     So Hawkeye did what many brave and noble men before him had done -- he returned to the Swamp and moped. It was in this state that Trapper happened to (literally) stumble upon him, having just finished up in the post-op ward with a particularly tricky case who, nevertheless, seemed to be coming along quite well.  
     "What's wrong, Hawk? You don't seem to be your usual chipper self today," Trapper said, smothering a wide yawn as he moved towards the still and poured them each a drink.   
     Hawkeye took his beverage with a look of contemplation on his face. "I've just been wallowing in my misery, that's all. Nothing new. I put in a lot of time and effort with Nurse Wilson, and it all just failed spectacularly. I'd have been better off spending that time sucking up to Frank, might have gotten a promotion by now." They were both silent for a moment, contemplating the horrors of sucking up to Frank. Hawkeye shuddered.  
     "You win some, you lose some, as they say."  
     "Gee, I never took you for a clichéd kinda guy, Trap."  
     "I am just full of surprises."  
     They shared a grin. "On second thought," Hawkeye said, "I coulda just hung out with you. At least the conversation would have been better."  
     "Yeah, but we both know I'm missing all the important bits. Well, the ones you would find important if we were in a dating type of situation. I'm doing just fine if it's me who's in the dating type of situation."  
     "Sex isn't everything," Hawkeye said airily, with a casual wave of the hand.   
     Trapper snorted. "Sure. It's just eighty-nine percent of everything. This is something you learn when you get married, Hawk."  
     Liquor was downed, glasses were refilled. Hawkeye made a remark about the weather. Trapper suggested they take the afternoon and go golfing for land mines. They enjoyed the pleasant springtime breeze, something that would be gone soon enough.  
     Hawkeye set his glass down. "What's the other eleven percent?"  
     Trapper shrugged. "I dunno. Love and devotion, or something like that. Friendship. Taking the kids to dance class and soccer practice. I guess it's whatever you want it to be."  
     "Golf, then," Hawkeye said, and got up to find the clubs.


End file.
